At his campaign headquarters, Eric T. Cartman is caught on camera as he is told that he has won the South Park E-lections.

By James Brilla
South Park Times

In an unprecedented sweep, Eric T. Cartman has taken the South Park E-Lection by storm. In one of the most important elections of the year 2004, Cartman fought hard for his victory.

"There were times where I was accused of ballot stuffing by a few of Kyle and Stan's supporters." Cartman said earlier in a telephone interview. "You know, the fact that they would have to stoop to that level to try and discredit me is really disheartening. I can't tell you how happy I am that I won this election so I can finally show those a**holes who's boss."

When asked about his first official act as Class President, Cartman said he wasn't going to worry about that right now. He is busy reserving Casa Bonita for his huge victory party.

We asked Eric about his victory and if he was surprised that he won by such a large margin. "Well, when you have a candidate with as much popularity as me, you have to expect a sweep like this. What did Stan and Kyle bring to the table anyway? All Stan and Kyle can do is whine about how things aren't going their way, however I didn't see any of them get over 40,000 votes. Why you may ask? Because when it comes to making promises not intended to be kept, I've got them beat hands down. The rest of the candidates were just filler in my opinion. Who the hell would have wanted Wendy in office anyway? She was obviously put in there just to make Stan and Kyle feel better about the whooping they took at the hands of me; I mean, even Token beat Wendy. So I guess in closing all I'd like to say is thank you to everyone that voted for me and believed in me, and to those that didn't; kiss my black ass."